


Maybe I do maybe I don't but I know I haven't yet

by kingdomfaraway



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Crush at First Sight, First Kiss, Grief/Mourning, Harley Keener Needs a Hug, M/M, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Precious Peter Parker, Road Trips, THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED, Travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-07
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-17 16:28:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28602945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kingdomfaraway/pseuds/kingdomfaraway
Summary: Peter agrees to go on the road trip with Harley Keener, despite only knowing the boy for three solid days. They met at Tony’s funeral, two teens drifting towards each other in the vast sea of adults. They knew of each other by name and reputation only but Peter feels a connection immediately.
Relationships: Harley Keener/Peter Parker
Comments: 15
Kudos: 181





	Maybe I do maybe I don't but I know I haven't yet

**Author's Note:**

> I haven’t written this ship yet and this fic came sailing into my head. Thought I’d give it a go. *squishes adorable geek boys together*
> 
> The title comes from I Woke Up In a Car by Something Corporate. 
> 
> All of the places mentioned by name are real locations. Some more fun to visit than others.

Peter agrees to go on the road trip with Harley Keener, despite only knowing the boy for three solid days. They met at Tony’s funeral, two teens drifting towards each other in the vast sea of adults. They knew of each other by name and reputation only but Peter feels a connection immediately.

They become inseparable, spending nearly all their time together in the large cabin. Peter has his room, his name is on the door but he doesn’t think he belongs among the actual Stark family’s doors. The only time he feels okay is when Harley sits in there with him. They fall asleep together on the bed so many times, it becomes the norm.

It isn’t until the third night they lay awake, above the covers, next to each other on the Queen size bed does Harley mentions his family. It isn’t lost on Peter that Harley arrives and stays alone. May meets Peter at the cabin only hours after he arrives and is staying until May can get a new apartment for them.

“My Mom and sister didn’t Blip,” Harley says, “she got remarried to some guy and they moved to Atlanta for some reason. Sister’s with them and now I have a half brother too.”

Harley lays on his back, hands behind his head. Peter’s the opposite, lays on his stomach, hands folded under his chin. Harley hums a little and then as if he’s not sure if he should continue. “My Dad ran out on us when I was a kid. Tony showed up a bit later, he was like some random cool uncle.”

“May’s all I have left,” Peter says softly. “My parents died when I was a kid, she raised me with my uncle, until he died,” he pauses now too, thinking about his next few words. “Mr. Stark found me shortly after my uncle died and uh, well, he was the closest thing I had to family. But I guess, now it’s just back to me and May again.”

“Damn, Peter,” Harley says, Peter feels him shift in the bed so he’s now laying on his side, facing Peter. Peter moves to mirror his position. “You’ve got one hell of a tragic backstory. Are you sure you're not secretly the villain?”

Peter laughs and rolls his eyes. Harley knows about Spider-man, not because Peter tells him but because everyone else brings it up. Each hero eventually connects the dots and then it’s endless questions and comments. The last few days have been a series of identity reveals and he’s getting sick of it.

“Yeah well,” Peter says, “it’s not too late for me to join the dark side.”

“Star Wars,” Harley bemoans but he does it with a smile. Harley sat next to Peter when he had his Facetime reunion with Ned. They talk for hours, about everything and nothing, which includes the Star Wars films they both miss. Harley snickers off-screen yells “NERD” every few minutes which only serves to make them giggle more.

Harley doesn’t call anyone and he didn’t seem to want to either. Peter’s lucky both Ned and MJ were Blipped too, his’s only friends didn’t outgrow him. 

“Where are you going after this?” Peter asks as they face each other in the darkness of the room. Harley’s back is towards the only window, the moonlight hits him from behind, casting a shadow over his face.

Harley shrugs and flips over to his back quickly, Peter stays staring at his profile. “I dunno. Tony gave me a lot of money and Pep says I can stick around for as long as I need to. I guess I should consider starting school again in August, but I’m not sure if I even want to. Mom and Kayla said I could stay with them in Atlanta, but I don’t think I want to do that either.” 

“You could come to Midtown with me, you’re smart enough to get in,” Peter blurts out quickly.

Harley laughs, it’s a warm one that fills Peter with something he’s unable to describe. Harley hums again, Peter can tell it’s a nervous habit he has. “To be honest, after all of this uh, coming back to life shit, I was thinking about how much of my life I wasted in Rose Hill. This is the first time I’ve been out of state and I’m 17 years old, it just feels pathetic.”

“I’ve only been out of New York a few times and the farthest I’ve been was when Mr. Stark took me to fight the Avengers. And uh, I guess you can count space too.”

“Okay, well that makes me sound a lot more pathetic, Peter,” Harley deadpans. “Kidding!” He adds when Peter opens his mouth to apologize. 

Silence washes over them and Peter thinks that maybe Harley’s fallen asleep. His eyes are closed, his breathing evens out a little, his heartbeat slows. Peter’s about to join him, his eyes closing slowly when Harley speaks up again. “Do you want to come to California with me? I want to drive there, maybe stop in Atlanta, Rose Hill, and a few other places. I never thought I’d have the chance to do something like this and I don’t want to die again not doing it.”

There’s no hesitation in Peter’s voice but he asks, just in case. “Are you sure you want to go with me? You just met me.”

“Yeah, wouldn’t be askin’ you if I wasn’t.”

“I’d have to ask May, but uh, yeah, that sounds cool. Sure.”

\-----

May’s apprehensive at first, but she looks at Peter with a look he doesn’t recognize and then agrees. Harley doesn’t ask permission from anyone. 

Pepper’s thrilled by the decision and she offers up one of Tony’s cars to use for the trip. Both of them say no at first, but she insists, and soon so does May. Peter thinks Harley will pick one of the fancy cars, but he doesn’t. He picks a small black car, simple and plan. 

The trip, Peter finds out, could take up to three weeks round trip. It’s almost 7,000 miles, 98 hours if they drove straight without stopping. Harley buys a real-life map from the store as they shop for food to take with them. He uses a marker to draw a line from New York, traces it through states and cities, draws a small star at Atlanta, Rose Hill & then Malibu. He plots their trip home with a different color and puts a single star on Queens. He insists on using the map for most of the trip, instead of the one in their phones.

“Be safe,” May says to him as they stand outside the car. The boys don’t have much in terms of luggage, neither of them has their old things. “Don’t you dare think of driving, Peter. If Harley gets tired, you pull over somewhere safe for the night.”

She hugs him, pulls him close, and kisses his temple. “Call or text me every single day, no excuses. And please, for the love of God, don’t eat gas station sushi, okay?”

Peter laughs as he pulls away. “I promise, as long as you promise to tell me if you need me to come back home, for any reason.”

“Of course, sweetie.” She smiles and Peter already misses her. She hugs Harley too, plants a kiss on his temple as well. Pepper hugs both of them, plants kisses on the tops of their heads. 

She hands them both sleek black credit cards, each with their names embossed on them. Peter has no idea how she had the time to get them made. “Please,” she says as she hands them over. “Use them. Spend as much as you need to, no expense is too much. If you need us, please call. We’ll come to get you boys, no matter what.”

They get into the car and Harley has a devilish grin on his face, it’s contagious and Peter finds himself grinning too. He waves at Pepper and May as Harley puts the car into drive and heads down the long driveway.

\-----

They drive, windows up, A/C blasts through the vents as a playlist Harley created add background music to their conversations. Peter packed a lot of snacks, within the first hour he’s already eaten his way through two boxes of Cheez-Its.

Harley laughs as he wipes cheese dust from his fingers onto the console when he doesn’t find a napkin.

“So,” Harley says as they leave New York and enter into New Jersey. “I didn’t get to hear how you became sticky.”

Peter grins. “Radioactive spider bite.”

“Really?” Harley asks, he risks a look away from the road and onto Peter’s face.

“Really, really. Field trip to Oscorp. I got distracted by some cool science stuff and went the wrong way. Ended up in this big room with a heck of a lot of bugs,” he shutters suddenly at the memory, “and uh, one of them got loose and bit me.”

“Damn,” Harley says in a low voice. “You’re lucky that didn’t kill you.”

“Oh, I thought it did. Right after the bit, it was alright, but then that night, I thought I was dying. I was the worst I'd ever felt in my life until…,” Peter stops, the memory of being pulled apart inch by inch floats into his head. It takes a second for him to swallow down the panic and Harley remains quiet, his fingers drum against the steering wheel. 

Peter recovers, puts himself back together, and continues as if nothing had stopped him. “It was bad, the next few days sucked, and then suddenly I realized I had powers. I could see and hear better, my senses were dialed up.”

“Are they still?” Harley asks, his voice is soft.

“Yeah. I’ve gotten really good at taming them but sometimes things get a little too much. Mr. Stark was helping me create something in my suit to help me too but uh…” He wonders if he’ll ever complete a sentence about Tony Stark again without a lump forming somewhere in his chest. 

“I can help,” Harley says into Peter’s silence, “when we get back. I’ll help you make something. Tony might have finished it when we were gone, we could try and see.”

Peter nods “Yeah, yeah, cool.”

Harley clears his throat, fingers still drum against the steering wheel. “What else happened? Did you tell anyone?”

“Oh, oh no. I didn’t tell anyone, I just let Ben and May think I had a cold. After the sense thing, I started sticking to stuff, from there it wasn’t a big stretch to realize I could climb and jump and stuff.”

“When did you start working on the webbing?”

“Right away, the idea just came to me. I was already really into chem, to begin with, and it was just natural. I always tinkered with making my formulas and stuff. It took me about a week to create the first version and the web-shooters came next.”

“Damn, Pete, that’s really impressive.”

Peter turns his head to look out the window and hide the blush that rushes his face. “I heard you helped Mr. Stark with his suit when you were elven right?”

“Yeah, well, I mean I kinda helped him. He did most of the hard work, I was just being a brat.”

“I wouldn’t say that,” Peter frowns. “Why are you always so negative about yourself?”

Harley laughs loudly. “Dude, that’s like a level 20 friendship question.”

Peter rolls his eyes. “You just unlocked my tragic backstory, isn’t that like a level 20 at least too?”

“Nah,” Harley teases. “Tragic backstories are like a level 5 nowadays. Everyone’s got one, no need to make it so special.”

Peter falters for a moment, he doesn’t know Harley, not really. He stares out the window, watches trees fly by. His heart aches to swing through them, wild and free. He hasn’t gone out since coming back from Titan. He yearns for the freedom it brings.

“Sorry,” he mumbles softly, part of him hopes Harley doesn’t hear it. 

“You sure say that a lot for someone who doesn’t ever do anything wrong.”

“I do plenty of things wrong,” Peter says a little defiant. 

Harley hums again. It’s not a melody, just a low rumble through closed lips. “If I put myself down first, no one’s gotta do it for me. Self defense, you know? People shit on you enough, you just start joining them.”

“That doesn’t sound very healthy,” Peter answers.

Harley laughs. “I didn’t think this would become therapy within the first hour of the car ride, but alright then, you do you.”

Peter actually laughs out loud, it takes him by surprise, a bubble of laughter that empties into the car.

\-----

They arrive in Greensboro, North Carolina around 8:00 at night. Peter walks around the hotel, his legs feel stiff and sore, as Harley checks them in. They enter the room with their bags, throwing them on the floor.

Harley grabs the room service menu from the desk before he falls onto his chosen bed.

“You hungry?” He questions, eyes on the menu, “I’ve always wanted to order a shit ton of room service.” 

“I could eat,” he answers honestly. 

“Cool.” 

Harley doesn’t ask what he wants, instead, he grabs the hotel phone and orders what sounds like a shit ton of food before he gets up to take a shower. Peter texts May about their arrival and gets a series of hearts in return. He dozes, listens to the sound of the shower, opens his eyes just in enough time to see a shirtless Harley appear.

Well, shit.

Peter knows Harley is handsome, but seeing him shirtless makes his heart flutter. He looks away, embarrassed, the all too familiar tint of pink crawls up his neck and onto his cheeks. The food arrives and Harley answers after he finishes pulling a shirt on.

Peter has to help Harley with the trays, he’s ordered a lot of food. They place them on Harley’s bed, scatter them out like a buffet. They mix and match their food choices and then sit back on Peter’s bed. Peter has a burger, fries, hummus, and a messy handful of nachos. Harley's got spaghetti, chicken fingers, and mash potatoes.

“Has it hit you yet?” Harley asks as he dips his chicken finger into the mash potatoes, “How much the world has changed on us?”

“Not yet,” Peter answers. “I don’t think I even… I don’t even realize it yet. It’s going to be weird, going back to school and seeing people suddenly 5 years older. Suddenly all the places I’d gone to, all the things I like, what if they don’t exist anymore? What if people that I’ve known my whole life just left and never came back?”

There’s a name that hangs in the air between them, neither of them say it but Peter knows Harley’s thinking about him all the same.

“Yeah,” Harley agrees. “I went to get my favorite sandwich from a local place in Rose Hill and found out it was now a barbershop. Like, I’m pissed, I’ll never get my turkey, apple, brie sandwich ever again.”

“What I hate the most is that it doesn’t feel like it’s been that long, because it hasn’t been. I closed my eyes for a minute and when I opened them again everything in the universe changed,” Peter looks away from his plate and off to the over the side of the room. “I went from dying in Tony’s arm to watching him die 10 minutes later and I… it hasn’t caught up yet. I’m just waiting for the weight of the last 5 years to crash down on me.”

“Hey woah,” Harley says and suddenly his hands are on Peter’s shoulders and Peter doesn’t remember how to breathe anymore. As if by saying those words, the weight of the world arrives on him. “Breath there, Pete. You’re getting worked up. Just relax, okay? Breathe.”

Peter breaths as slowly as he can. He reels himself in from the panic, eyes shut until he feels he can open them again. After several long minutes, he turns and looks at Harley. “Sorry, I didn't mean to freak out. This is, this is all too new.”

Harley lets go of Peter’s shoulders and moves closer to him, the length of their arms touching. “Freak out all you want, it’s normal.”

Peter laughs a little. “I don’t think anything is normal anymore.”

\-----

The first two things Peter realizes about Atlanta is that it’s hot and that every street is named Peachtree.

It takes the two of them nearly an hour of aimlessly driving around until they pull into Harley’s Mom’s driveway. After they park, Harley hesitates, his hands clench the steering wheel.

“We don’t have to go in,” Peter says. “If you want we can turn around and head out. We can tell them we changed our minds.”

“I’m here,” Harley answers his voice holding a rough tone to it. “I just need to go in and suck it up. She’s still my Mom and Kayla’s still my sister.”

Peter knows he’s been saying this in this head since they left. He can tell this is harder on Harley a lot more than he led on. Peter wants to say something really smart and good, wants to make Harley feel better but he’s ill-equipped to handle things. He doesn't know how Harley feels, it’s not the same for him. He’s lucky for once, he doesn’t have to find where he fits in with the people he loves. 

Harley pushes the door open suddenly and Peter scrambles to get out and catch up to him.

Harley’s already ringing the doorbell when Peter catches up. Harley’s Mom opens the door and the first thing Peter thinks is just how much Harley takes after her. Harley’s taller, but they share the same dirty blonde hair, blue eyes, and the general shape of their faces. 

There’s a weird dance that happens when they walk inside, Harley's Mom goes to hug him and he takes a step back but then follows through on the hug. A girl shows up a second later, she looks like the exact opposite of Harley. She’s small, short, long curly blonde hair and bright green eyes. He assumes that’s his sister, despite the differences in features, they look like a pair. 

“Mom, Kayla, this is Peter Parker, he’s a friend,” Harley introduces him as they stand in the doorway. 

“Nice to meet you, Mrs…,” he trails because no one told him her new last name, he only knew Harley’s.

“Wilson, but you can call me Mable, please. It’s nice to meet you too Peter, I’m glad you were able to take the trip with Harls.”

Peter smiles and they move into the living room, spaced out on two very big couches. Despite the space, Harley sits directly next to Peter, close enough for them to touch, Peter doesn’t move away.

He listens quietly as Mable and Kayla talk about life after the Blip. Listens as Mable talks about meeting Henry and then giving birth to baby Jared. The baby in question is asleep somewhere but Peter knows Harley’s unsure about meeting him. Henry, thankfully, remains at work until later, Mable correctly guesses that Harley’s not ready to meet him yet. 

Eventually, the small talk starts to fizzle until Harley brings up Tony Stark, completely out of the blue. Peter knows he makes a sound, partly between a whine and yelp. Harley presses himself closer to his side. 

“That’s how you two met, isn’t it? Through Mr. Stark?” Mable asks.

“Yeah, I’m his intern,” Peter answers and then he catches himself. “Was his intern.”

The conversation moves on, Mable asks Peter about his life and he tells them the generics, talks about Queens and Midtown, mentions May too. Harley’s quieter than loud but Peter takes the cue and tries to keep up the conversation. 

They talk for an hour or so, eventually, Mable takes Harley into another room to give him something. Harley comes back into the room holding a large box with his name on it. Mable offers them the guest room for the night, but Harley says they have already booked a hotel. 

Everyone knows he’s lying but no one says anything about it.

As they pull out of the driveway, Peter reaches over and puts his hand on Harley’s arm. “It’s alright.”

Harley just nods. 

\-----

The motel they stay at is attached to a waffle house and a strip club. They don’t notice until it’s morning and they sit in the waffle house for breakfast. 

“Your family seems nice,” Peter offers as he pours gallons of syrup on his pancakes. 

“Yeah, they are great,” Harley says absent-mindedly and Peter thinks that’ll be the end of the conversation. But instead, Harley starts talking again. 

“I love them, don’t get me wrong, but uh, I don't really want to be with them right now. They’ve outgrown me,” he stops and Peter can hear the implications of his words. Outgrown means replaced, that’s what Harley wants to say.

“Kayla is only a year younger than me and I look at her and I don’t see the same bratty sister I had months ago, Peter. I can’t look at her without seeing everything that happened, without knowing that the world moved on from me for 5 solid years. My Mom had a baby, Tony had a baby. People were born and people died.”

Peter reaches out and puts his hand on top of Harley’s. His fingers are sticky from holding the syrup bottle but Harley doesn’t pull away. “Everything will be alright.”

Harley breaths, eyes fluttering shut for a moment. When he opens them, Peter’s already moved his hand away and starts eating his pancakes. “You think it’s okay if I don’t stay here with them?”

“Of course,” Peter says, mouth full. “You do you.”

Harley grins and goes back to eating his waffles. 

\-----

They pick up Kayla at the house after breakfast, she’s offered to take them downtown for the day before they leave for Rose Hill tomorrow. Peter sits in the back seat, he wants to give the siblings their time together. 

He listens to them laugh and talk, it’s easier than it was the day before. Harley seems to relax and talk as much as he does with Peter. She has Harley drive around downtown, she points outbuildings and places she likes. 

Kayla insists on taking them to a burger place called The Vortex for a late lunch/early dinner. She tells them it’s the best burgers in the entire state and Peter’s eager to try.

“Ohh, Pete,” Harley says to him as they look at the menu. “They’ve got an insane eating challenge.”

Peter grins. “Yeah?”

“Quadruple Coronary Bypass Burger. You’ve gotta eat the burger, 10 ounces of fries, 10 ounces of tater tots, covered in cheese and bacon, and drink 2 32 ounce sodas all in 30 minutes,” Harley reads from the menu. He lowers it when he finishes and gives Peter a grin that makes his heart stammer a little.

“Sounds easy enough,” Peter responds.

Kayla laughs very loudly, it reminds him of Harley’s laugh. She looks between both of them and after a minute says. “Oh, you’re serious?” She looks at Peter. “No offense or anything but you don’t look like you weigh as much as all that food does.”

“You,” Harley says, “have not seen this boy eat. I bet he can do two of these challenges and still have room for dessert.”

Kayla shakes her head. “Go for it,” she says with another giggle. 

When they order the waitress looks as disbelieving as Kayla does, but takes the order anyway. Peter signs and dates a waiver she puts in front of him and then they’re waiting.

“So, did you get to meet any superheroes?” Kayla asks, Peter takes a sip of his water to avoid answering.

“A few,” Harley chimes in and then shrugs. “Wasn’t really worried about all that, tho. With uh, Tony being gone.”

Kayla’s face falls a little. “Sorry, I know it’s rough. He was good for you, Harls. I know how much he meant to you.”

“Does Henry treat you right?” Harley asks suddenly, his voice is small as if he’s scared to ask.

Kayla’s face brightens, she smiles and Peter can tell it’s genuine. “He’s the best, he really is. He takes care of us and treats us really well. Mom really had a hard time with it when you were Blipped, Harley. She couldn’t stand to stay in the house, that’s why we moved. She met Henry at a support group, he lost most of his family too. They talked about you all the time, still do.”

Harley nods, Peter can see tears in his eyes but he wipes them away. “Good, good. I want him to be good for you guys.”

“Jared’s not your replacement, Harls. I know that’s what you're thinking, but he’s not.”

“Wasn’t thinkin’ that,” Harley lies but Kayla doesn’t call him out on it. Peter thinks about Morgan, the child Tony left behind. Was she a replacement for all the people Tony lost too? He hates to think of it that way as if she doesn’t even matter in the scheme of things. It makes him angry at himself because she’s a real-life person and she doesn’t deserve to be thought of like that. 

When their food arrives, the waitress announces the food challenge and Peter regrets his choices. He hates being the center of attention, he wonders why he even agreed to do it. Harley’s eyes light up when the food is put in front of Peter and he looks more excited than Peter feels. 

As soon as the countdown starts, Peter digs in. He’s used to eating a lot, he’s been forced to, to make sure his body stays alive and well. There is a lot of food, maybe more than what he’s ever at in one seating. Harley and Kayla keep encouraging him as they eat their own much smaller portions. 

Other people cheer Peter on as they see him in front of the mountain of food. He hates the attention but Harley keeps smiling at him and it suddenly doesn’t matter much. The world zeros back into just the three of them at the table and Peter eats.

Twenty seven minutes later, Peter finishes his last fry and slip of pop. The place cheers around them, someone comes up and slaps his back so hard he feels like he might puke everything back up. He’s forced to take a photo holding up a shirt, he grabs Harley and makes him stand next to him in it. He knows he looks dorky, Harley’s got his arm around his waist and Peter tries not to smile like an idiot but fails.

“I honestly can’t believe that you ate all of that food,” Kayla marvels as they leave the restaurant. “I mean, where does it go?”

Peter shrugs. “I’ve got a fast metabolism, that’s all.”

When they get back to the house, Henry’s home. Harley parks in the driveway and sits in the car again. Everyone’s silent until Harley clears his throat. “Do you think I can go in there, uh, by myself for a few?”

Peter assumes he’s talking just to him, so he nods. “Yeah, I’m in a food coma right now anyway.”

Kayla speaks up. “Just text me when you’re ready for me to come in.”

Peter’s taken aback a little, surprised that he doesn’t want his sister there, but she doesn’t seem to mind. Harley nods and then gets out of the car and up to the door with lightning speed.

“So,” Kayla starts, as soon as Harley’s out of the car. She turns completely around in her seat, so she’s looking around at him from the passenger seat. “You’re friends with Harls?”

The real question is highly implied and it takes Peter a moment to recover. It’s not that he doesn't think of Harley in that light, it’s hard for him not to. He’s gone from barely knowing the guy to sleeping next to him, to roading tripping with him within a week. Harley barreled into his life much as Mr. Stark had done. 

And Harley, Harley is beautiful. Peter’s only human. What he doesn’t know is if Harley’s into him or not. The question Kyla asks doesn’t leave much room for speculation anymore.

“Oh,” Kayla says at Peter’s silence. “Shit, you guys are just friends aren’t you?”

“Uh, yeah. Sorry. I mean, I don’t mind or anything but yeah, we really did just meet each other.”

“Oh,” she makes a face, “sorry. I hope that doesn’t change anything.”

“No, no,” Peter says quickly, he tries to give her a reassuring smile. “It’s good.”

Kayla stills for a moment and then leans in close to Peter. “I don’t think Harley’s gonna stick around here or come back, to be honest. I see the look in his eyes, he doesn’t think he belongs here anymore. I think he’s wrong but uh, Harls is stubborn as hell,” she pauses. “Look out for him, will you? I love my brother but I think, I think we’re not what he needs anymore.”

“Promise,” Peter says, his throat suddenly very dry. “I promise to take care of him.”

\-----

Rose Hill looks like every other small town Peter’s seen. Harley takes him to his old house, they pull up but don’t get out of the car.

“I came back to my room,” Harley says. “I had just gotten home from work and then suddenly it wasn’t my room. Someone else lived there, scared the shit out of me.”

“What’d you do?”

“Panicked, honestly,” Harley answers. “There were strangers in my house and my room looked different. The couple living there tried to explain to me what was going on but I didn’t believe them. Then my next door neighbor came over, she didn’t Blip and my Mom had called her to find me and she did. The couple let me stay at the house until I could figure out what to do. I planned on going to Atlanta but uh, I got an automatic email from Tony, it triggered once he died.”

“Oh,” Peter says. “Email?”

“Yeah, it just said something about now that he’s dead, blah, blah. Pepper called me the next day and flew me up.”

“Oh,” Peter says, he looks away and back out the window. “I don’t think he sent me one.”

“I’m sure he left you something,” Harley answers. “I wouldn’t worry about it, it doesn’t mean anything. You were really important to him, Pete. I know you were, he talked about you all the time.”

Peter nods and tries to not think about it. Tony left him money, he knows that enough to fund as many college degrees as he could think of. He doesn’t want it, doesn’t want to touch it but he knows he’ll eventually give in. If he’s left him anything else, he doesn’t know. 

“Yeah,” Peter says, mostly to reassure himself. 

\-----

They park in what Harley calls the “downtown” area, which ends up being a few blocks of storefronts. They walk together, side by side, through the small town. Harley shows him the places he went with Mr. Stark.

“And here’s where I triggered a panic attack for him,” he points to a spot on the ground. He smiles at it, fondly and it makes Peter grin.

As they walk their way down the street, Harley slows as two other guys walk towards them. Peter reads the body language. “Okay?” He asks in a small voice, he moves closer to Harley’s side, their arms touching.

“Yeah,” Harley says, a little breathless but otherwise calm. They walk forward but as they approach the guys, one of them lets out a loud bark of a laugh.

“Oh look who it is,” he preens, Peter can partially see the words High School Bully tattooed on the guy’s head. “Harley Quer-”

“Shut the fuck up Andrew,” Harley interrupts him and Peter’s taken aback by the venom in his voice. 

Andrew laughs and smacks the other guy’s arm. “Looks like Harley’s grown a pair,” he muses. “I thought we finally managed to get rid of you.”

Before Harley can open his mouth, Peter surges forward, stands in front of Harley, and much closer to the guys. “Leave him alone.”

They both laugh but Peter doesn’t move. Harley reaches out and grabs Peter’s wrists, the move makes the other boys laugh again. “They aren’t worth it,” Harley says to him. “Peter, they aren’t worth it.”

In all the years that Flash has made fun of him, bullied him, Peter’s never fought back. He’s never wanted to, he’s always able to walk away but now, now Peter wants to fight. He wants to push back at these guys, he wants to hurt the guys who might have hurt Harley before. An abundance of protectiveness floods his veins.

“Aw, little Harleys got himself a boyfriend now! I bet your Daddy’s glad he left you now, he’d be embarrassed to have a pansy as a son,” Andrew mocks again and Peter’s blood boils with anger.

Harley tugs on his arm again but addresses the guys. “Just let us go, alright? We’re leaving anyway, don’t want to stay in this shit hole longer than we have to.”

Peter locks eyes with Andrew, he doesn’t look all that intimidated but he doesn’t know who Peter really is. He clenches his fists, his body taut and tense.

But then he breaths and feels the pressure of Harley’s fingertips on his skin and it brings him back down from anger. He takes a step back and Harley’s hand slides down into his. Peter moves, walks forward, and around the two guys, who laugh and jeer at them. Harley trails behind him.

“Sorry,” he says, his hand still locked into Peter’s. “Those guys are assholes. Not worth your time.”

“Not worth your time either,” Peter says lamely. 

\-----

There isn’t a place to stay in Rose Hill, instead, they drive an hour to a hotel off the side of the highway. Harley’s silent the whole car ride, the radio stays turned off. Peter can’t think of a single thing to say, so he keeps quiet too.

They check into the hotel, Peter carries both of their smaller bags inside. They walk in silence down the hallway to room 103. When they get inside Harley drops himself down on the first twin bed he sees. Peter rolls the suitcases to the other side, kicks off his shoes, and hovers awkwardly beside his bed.

“I hate Rose Hill as much as I love it. Is that weird? That place sucks but it’s my home, it’s where I grew up. I have so many horrible stupid memories attached to it and when I try to think I’ll never go back, I feel like I can’t breathe. As much as I hate it, it’s my home but I don’t belong there.” 

Harley’s voice is strained like he’s forcing out every word. Peter lays on his bed, mirroring Harley’s position. 

“You don’t need to change who you are to belong somewhere,” Peter says. This is another situation he can’t relate to. He’s always felt like he belongs in Queens, it’s his home, it’s the place he protects. He doesn't know how he’d feel if he didn’t belong there. 

“I feel like I have to belong there and I don’t know why.”

Peter rolls over so he can see Harley and after a second, gets up and gets in the bed next to him. There’s barely enough room for both of them to fit, Harley has to scoot over a little.

“You don’t have to belong there. You can belong anywhere you want to, Harley. If you want to live in Atlanta with your family then you can. If you want to live in Queens with… with me and May then you can do that too. If you want to live with Pepper and Morgan, you can too. You shouldn’t have to change who you are just to feel welcome.”

Peter knows the issue Harley’s facing a little better now. It’s stereotypical as hell, but that doesn’t mean it’s not happening.

“I’m bi,” Peter says quickly, he stares up at the popcorn ceiling. “Just so you know. I mean, I’m not here to make assumptions.”

“Me too,” Harley says softly. “I’m bisexual or whatever, I don’t like labels. But yeah, me too.”

“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. I just got the feeling that Rose Hill maybe wasn't the most accepting place in the world.”

“Not really. I never planned on outing myself to everyone, but I made the mistake of liking some guy who uh, didn’t want to be gay no more, so he told everyone. It wasn’t a big deal, most people didn’t care but dicks like Andrew used it as an excuse to be bigger dicks.”

“I think you’re better than that place anyway,” Peter answers and never, ever as he hoped to say the right thing before. “Rose Hill doesn’t deserve you, you don’t need to try to fit into a place like that anyway.”

Harley sits up on his elbows and Peter does too. They stare at each other and Peter’s heart is racing.

Peter has never been good at signals or romance. He’s just too shy and awkward, fumbles his words, never knows when to shut up and go with it. There’s a voice in the back of his head that tells him to lean in and kiss Harley, throw caution to the wind, and go for it.

And for once, he listens. 

Peter leans in and without an ounce of fear, kisses Harley softly on the lips. Harley doesn’t move and Peter’s heart beats so much fast. The arm Harley supports himself on trembles only slightly but as Peter leans away, Harley follows him. He crashes his lips back onto Peter’s and it’s awkward, teeth clink and they pull apart laughing.

“Sorry,” Peter breaths, they are leaning in close still, his nose bumps into Harley’s. 

Harley smiles and kisses him again.

\-----

In the morning they wake up together under the covers. Harley's arm is around his waist, his head on the pillow beside him. There’s drool on the corner of his mouth and Peter holds back a giggle at the sight. They get up like nothing’s different, take turns in the shower but they brush their teeth side by side in the small bathroom, jostling for elbow room. Harley throws on one of Peter’s science pun shirts and when he notices, Harley’s face turns pink.

“All my stuff is dirty,” he says in response.

Peter smiles and tries to hide the blush that colors his cheeks. 

The shirt’s a little small on him, every time he moves it rides up just a little and Peter wonders how much of this is Harley’s way of teasing him. 

They grab breakfast at McDonald's, swallow down greasy foods, and drink bland tasting coffee. They drive across Tennessee, the countryside flies by Peter’s window. They stop in Nashville, only to get some Nashville Hot Chicken, at Harley’s demand.

“You haven’t eaten enough southern foods,” he tells Peter as they sit in what looks like a small drive bar. “You need to experience it all.”

Harley makes them listen to country music as they leave the city. Harley doesn't know all the words to the songs, but that doesn’t stop him from crooning out words, completely off-key.

Peter laughs. “Can you sing or are you just torturing me?”

“What?” Harley says in a very thick southern accent. “Are you being mean to me Peter Parker? Momma says my voice is as pretty as a songbird.”

They both laugh, Peter reaches over and turns up the music to drown out Harley’s off-key wails. The sound is so loud it makes his ears ring, but nothing has ever sounded so sweet. 

\-----

When they arrive in Memphis, Peter goes to get a room. He hesitates when the girl at the lobby asks what type but ends up requesting a single bed. 

Harley arrives after, pulling only one set of luggage down the hallway. When they walk into the room, Harley whistles. “Wow, bold move Peter. What do you think you’re getting lucky tonight?”

He plops down on the bed and bats his eyes at him. Peter grins and sits on the bed, back against the headboard and legs outstretched in front of him. Harley lays on the edge still, his legs touching the ground.

“Uh, are we, uh, dating or..,” Peter asks, he feels the blush on his face. 

Harley gets up and moves to sit next to him, reaches over and puts Peter’s hand in his. “It’s up to you,” he answers. “I mean, I know we don’t know each other very well, but uh, I like you.”

Peter leans his head onto Harley’s shoulder. “I like you too.”

“Good,” Harley says as if that settles it completely. He crosses his legs at the ankles and squeezes Peter’s hand. “I’m glad we’re on the same page.”

Peter nods and then, a feeling creeps into his heart. Grief, Peter knows all too well, doesn’t go by anyone’s rules or schedule. There are still times he wakes up calling for his parents or Ben. There are still times he misses them more than anything and can’t even move without remembering what he’s lost.

Sitting next to Harley, their fingers intertwined, he's hit with such a profound feeling of loss. Tendrils of grief reach out and wave their way around his heart.

Harley must have noticed something, he moves even closer to Peter’s side.

“You alright?”

“Mr. Stark,” Peter says softly. “I miss him so much.”

Harley asks. “Why do you call him that?”

“Respect,” Peter answers and then. “It also annoyed the shit out of him.”

Harley laughs out loud. “Yeah, I suspect it would have. I wonder if he would have tried to set us up or anything.”

“He would have been the worse matchmaker,” Peter answers, “he’s so extra sometimes. I’m sure he would have tried to make it seem like an accident too. He’d keep putting us next to each other at lab tables or something.”

“What’s your favorite memory of him?” Harley asks him.

Peter thinks for a moment, he doesn’t have a whole lot of memories, not really. It takes a second for him to settle on one. “I used to go to the lab on Friday after school. The first couple of times we worked on things, but then one day it just changed. I walked into the lab and he asked if I wanted to watch a movie instead. We watched the Goonies and ate pizza. I know it’s stupid, but uh, it was just really nice.”

Harley kisses the side of his head. “Not stupid, Pete.” He hums softly to himself. “About a year after I met him, he called me up out of the blue one day. We’d talked a little here and there, he sent me some stuff for my garage. But yeah, he called just asked how I was and stuff. Nothing special about it. I didn’t think he cared.”

“He did,” Peter answers. “Mr. Stark cared a whole lot, I just think he didn’t really know how to tell people that sometimes.” 

\-----

In Tulsa they overhear someone talk about something called “The Center of The Universe”. Harley doesn't even ask, he looks up directions and shouts when he sees it’s within walking distance. He grabs Peter’s hand and they walk around Tulsa’s very small downtown.

They arrive at a small concrete circle in the middle of a large brick circle, in the middle of nowhere. It’s boring and plain, the most interesting thing about it is the large amounts of graffiti littered on all of the bricks.

“So, I googled it when you dragged me here,” Peter says to Harley as he goes to stand in the middle of the circle. “It’s apparently some acoustic phenomenon. If you stand in the middle of the circle and make a noise, it echoes back at you really loudly. And if I’m not in the circle I can’t hear it.”

Harley grins and plants himself firmly in the middle. He makes a shoo shoo motion until Peter’s completely outside of the circle. There’s no sound but he can see Harley’s talking. Peter can hear it very faintly, weird mysterious phenomena are no match for his super hearing. He doesn't know what Harley’s saying, but at one point he can tell Harley yells something. 

When he’s finished, Harley looks pretty pleased with himself.

“Your turn!” He exclaims. “Tell the heavens your deepest darkest secrets.”

Peter snorts but entertains Harley, he stands in the Center of the Universe and looks out into the city before him. 

He clears his throat. “I miss my parents.” The words echo out and back to him. “I miss Ben. I miss Tony. I hate that I spend most of my life missing people. I hate that I’m a curse to the ones I love. I hate that I can’t save them, that I couldn’t save them.”

He looks over at Harley. He’s standing outside the largest circle, both of his hands shoved into his jean pockets. He’s wearing Peter’s NASA shirt, it barely fits him, the hem of the shirt rides up over the top of his jeans but he looks comfortable. His hair is wild, untamed curls that fall over his forehead. He smiles and looks at Peter like he's the most important person in the universe.

Peter locks his eyes on Harley’s and yells into the universe. “I’m falling in love with Harley Keener.”

\-----

“Do you think he knew?” Harley asks as they pass through Albuquerque.

Harley could be asking him a lot of different things. Did Tony know he was going to die? Did Tony know that everything worked? Did Tony know they loved him? Did Tony know they would meet one day? Did Tony know the world was going to be okay without him? Did Tony know the grief he was leaving behind?

“Yeah,” Peter answers all of them. “I think he did.”

\-----

They leave the restaurant in Flagstaff, Arizona when something happens so fast, Peter can barely breathe.

The humidity reminds him of Titan, it lingers in the back of his mind like a ghost and then a gust of wind blows up dust that twirls in the air and Peter suddenly can’t breathe.

He stops walking, the hand that’s intertwined with Harley’s squeezes tight enough that Harley yelps. Peter pulls his hand away and stumbles forwards. 

Panic, is all he feels, panic, panic, pain, pain, dying, death, Tony.

He cries out, a sob that drops him to his knees in the restaurant’s parking lot. Harley’s talking to him, somewhere, maybe miles away. The world goes blurry around him, whites out like he’s in a snowstorm. He feels like he’s being torn apart, inch by inch.

It takes several long seconds before he hears Harleys’ actual voice, he feels Harley’s hands on his shoulders. He feels them, it reminds him that he’s solid again and not dust.

“Harls,” he says with a tight voice.

“It’s okay, Peter. You’re okay, just breathe. Can you get up? I can take us back to the hotel.”

Peter nods and Harley helps him up and into the car. He feels more in focus now but still in danger of floating off. Harley helps him out of the car and takes his hand, leads him to their room. He coaxes Peter to lay down in the bed, Harley lays down beside him.

“I felt it all,” Peter says, a whisper into the room. Harley grabs his hand and holds on tight as if he’s tethering Peter to the world. “Everyone else just turned to dust but I felt every second of it. I was being pulled apart and it hurt, Harley, it hurt so much. I fought it, I fought so hard.”

He’s yet to tell a single soul what happened. When he came back there were other things to worry about. He thought he was fine, but seeing the dust in the air, brought him back to that last moment. Clingy desperately onto Tony, wishing his mentor could keep him together.

“I’m so sorry,” Harley says softly, his hand squeezes Peter’s again. 

“It’s okay,” Peter says, “it’s just scary. I was clinging to Mr. Stark so tightly, I was so scared. I knew something bad was happening and then every single atom in my body was fading away and I couldn’t hold on.”

“I’ve got you now,” Harley responds. 

\-----

Harley insists they stop in LA instead of going straight to Malibu. They get into town late and Harley picks out an insanely lavish hotel. Peter’s too tired to object and he enjoys the large King Size bed and even more so, the jetted hot tub in their room.

In the morning Harley drags him downtown. “We’ve gotta sightsee a little,” he says. He grabs Peter’s hand and their fingers intertwined, they fit like a key into a lock. 

It's hot out, the sun’s bearing down on them. Harley’s wearing a pair of sunglasses that remind Peter way too much of Tony’s. They get lost a little in the streets as they walk along like tourists.

There’s a small tattoo shop they pass and Harley drags him inside. 

“I don’t know Harls,” he says, “we’re not old enough.”

“That’s not what our IDs say and come on, you only live once.”

Peter’s not sure a tattoo would even stay on his skin but he relents. The tattoo artist looks at their IDs, Harley certainly looks old enough but Peters way too baby-faced. They fill out forms as they sit in plastic seats.

“May’s gonna kill me,” he says as he signs the bottom of the form anyway.

The design they pick is simple, the periodic table sign for iron. The box is small, with Fe front and center. On the top sits the atomic number, across from that it’s the atomic weight like normal, however, instead of the electronic configuration under the Fe, they each put the date they met Tony. 

Peter hedges a little. “Well, I mean I technically met him when I was like 8 at the Stark Expo. He saved me from getting blasted by one of those renegade suits. I was in a little mask and fake hand gauntlet and I thought I could stand up to them. He came in the nick of time.”

Harley laughs so hard Peter thinks he’s going to choke. “I can’t believe you. Always the hero dude, that’s crazy. I think you should put both dates. It’s your tattoo.”

He goes with both and under those dates, they each have Tony Stark written there instead of just iron. They both get them under their ribs, like a secret message hidden on skin. 

“Fan of Iron Man?” The tattoo artist asks before he starts on Harley’s tattoo first. Harley makes a noncommittal sound and the tattoo artist gets to work. It takes only 30 minutes each to finish the tattoos. Harley makes a few pained faces as the guy works, Peter sits across from him and offers a hand.

When it’s Peter's turn it barely hurts but when Harley offers his hand, he takes it anyway. 

When they leave they walk past a memorial for Iron Man, his pictures painted on a giant wall. There are flowers and gifts left by grateful people. 

They stop to look at the giant Iron Man without talking, hands still holding onto each other like lifelines. 

\-----

When they arrive in Malibu, they drive up the long driveway to Mr. Stark’s old house. It still belongs to the Starks, but it’s empty of inhabitants. There are flowers and cards left outside the gate, pictures little kids drew of Iron Man. Peter can’t look at them for too long without something catching in his throat.

The house is a silent and looming building. Peter remembers seeing it on TV a long time ago but in person it’s different. It’s an odd feeling, the building screams Tony Stark but not in the way Peter knows him. 

Harley takes him by the hand as they walk around to the cliffside. They stop at the cliff’s edge, Peter looks out into the sky and sea, the smell of salt and water fills his senses. 

“You know why I wanted to come here?” Harley asks him after a few minutes of silence. “Because it’s the reverse path that he took to get to me. His suit malfunctioned and flew him from Malibu to Rose Hill overnight. He just came into my life so randomly and without warning, I just wanted to see it you know? It’s stupid, really.”

“It’s not stupid, Harls.”

“I miss him. I miss him so much I don’t know what to do with myself. I always thought he’d be around, he’d be too stubborn to just die. And I think it’s so stupid because it’s not like I knew him my entire life or anything. I’m not his actual child, I’m not Morgan. I just talked to him through emails and on the phone, I was just a background character in his life, a footnote in a biography. But I just, I feel like I’m missing so much more than just a person.”

Peter swallows down the lump in his throat, hopes he can get the words out, the ones that he needs to say. “I know what you mean. I only had him in my life for a few years, less than you, less than Morgan even. He just, he gave me so much that I feel lost without him.”

“God damn that man,” Harley says, he’s got tears in his eyes and Peter knows he does too. “How can one idiot make such a difference in our lives so quickly?”

Peter smiles, despite himself. “I guess we’ll just have to help each other, instead.”

They stand for a while, fingers intertwined, looking out into the ocean, on a cliffside of what used to be Tony’s home.

\-----

In Nevada, they stay outside of Las Vegas, in a large resort hotel. It’s another splurge but it’s worth it.

They’re too young to gamble, but they walk through the small casino at the hotel. Harley plays the penny slots, as Peter hovers over his shoulder. They eat at a fancy buffet where Peter stuffs himself full and then some, as Harley tries to keep up but fails.

The pool outside is the nicest thing Peter’s ever seen, it looks like something out of a paradise fantasy. They swim for a while, their skin gets covered in prunes before they head back up to their room.

They sit side by side against the headboard. Peter’s texting May pictures from the pool, avoiding any shots you can see the bandages on their ribs. He’s planning on tackling that in person.

“What happens when we get home?” Harley asks randomly.

“As in us or?” Peter asks a little clueless. He’s been on the road now for 13 days and Queens feels like a lifetime ago. They’re still so far away from home, it’s not even a thought in his mind. 

“Yeah, I mean you said I can maybe stay with you and May or something…,” he trails, “sorry I’m just inviting myself.”

“No, you’re not. I want you to stay with us, I mean we don’t have much room or anything, but we can make room for you.”

“I just don’t want you to think that this is just a grief thing. I miss Tony a lot but I also like you a lot and yeah you remind me of him but well, I mean… this is not going great, I’m sorry.”

Peter pauses before he talks, not wanting to ruin things. “After my parents died, Ben and May made sure I knew they weren't replacing them. And while I knew it, I still… felt it. I was a kid, so yeah but eventually I realized they weren’t my parents, they were just a different name for the same thing. It happened with Mr. Stark after Ben died… he wasn’t replacing anyone, he was just a whole nother thing. I feel the same way about you, yeah you remind me of Mr. Stark but I know you’re not him and I don’t expect you to be him either.”

Harley exhales loudly, leans further into Peter’s side. He’s warm and Peter’s skin is chill from the pool still. 

“We can figure something out,” Peter says softly to him, he drops his head down to Harley’s shoulder. He smells like chlorine but Peter doesn’t mind one bit. 

\-----

“Do you think I could have stopped him?” Peter asks somewhere in Colorado. They had just finished driving through the mountains. Peter’s already a little bit in love with the landscape, he takes a million photographs, sends them to everyone he knows.

“Doubt it,” Harley answers, eyes glued to the road ahead. He’s nervous about the terrain but Peter feels safe and hopes Halrye knows that.

“I think about things like that a lot. When my parents died, when Ben died… like would I change if I could? Would I tell them not to go on the plane? What if I didn’t argue with Ben that night? What if I took the gauntlet instead?” Peter says.

Harley hums for a moment. “I’m sure there’s a universe out there where you did one of those things.”

Peter nods and thinks about it, a universe where his parents were alive, where Ben was alive, where Tony is alive. He looks at Harley as he drives, would he know Harley in those too? Would they have met? 

“I like this one,” Peter admits. “I think it's taken a while but uh, I don’t think I’d actually change anything. Not now, at least.”

“If you say it’s because you found me in this one or some other cheesy shit, I’m leaving you at a truck stop.”

Peter laughs. 

\-----

They sleep in the car at a truck stop in Iowa, something both May and Pepper forbad them from doing. It’s late, they can’t find a hotel and Harley’s eyes can barely stay open.

“I’m Spider-man,” Peter whispers as he lays down in the passenger seat. “I got spidey senses, if danger shows up, I’ll know.”

Harley mumbles something that Peter doesn’t catch. “What?”

“I said,” Harley speaks up, “I’ve seen this horror movie and I know how it ends.”

“If you think I can’t defeat a chainsaw-wielding maniac then you have no faith in me.”

“Uh-huh, I mean webs versus chainsaw sounds like a fair fight.”

\-----

In Chicago, they stop at Navy Pier and Peter drags Harley over to the Ferris wheel. It looms before them and Peter can see Harley’s trepidation.

“Don’t like heights,” he says as they wait in line. Peter squeezes the hand he’s holding and kisses him on the cheek. 

“It’ll be okay, you’re with me,” he answers and Harley scowls at him a little but doesn’t move to leave the line.

When it’s their turn, they move from the platform to the carriage and duck inside. Peter looks out the windows and marvels at the view. The city reminds him of New York and he gets hit with a feeling of homesickness.

“You’re used to this view, aren’t you? Harley asks, he’s sitting next to Peter but he’s looking out of the window as well.

“Yeah, it never gets old.”

The Ferris wheel continues it’s way around, bringing them from views of the city to views of the lake. Harley peers over Peter’s shoulder the entire time, body presses into Peter’s side.

The homesick feeling travels with him when they get off the ride and walk down the pier. He’s being quiet and he knows Harley can tell somethings wrong. When they make it to the end of the pier, they stop to look out into the lake.

“I don’t know how to be Spider-man with him,” Peter confesses. “It’s just stupid because I was Spider-man long before he came around but now when I think about putting the suit back on… I just, I don’t know if I can do it without him being there.”

“You can,” Harley answers, “and you will.”

Peter laughs a tight sound that barely leaves his throat. “You can’t just say that.”

“Yeah, I can. I mean, listen, I might not know that much about Spider-man but I think I know you pretty well at this point. And there’s no way you aren’t going to go back out there. And most of all Tony wants you to be Spider-man too with or without him.”

“I’d rather it be with him,” he admits softly. “I might screw up.”

“Yeah well,” Harley huffs, he draws his arms across his midsection. It’s a little chilly this close to the lake. “You are going to screw up because that’s life.”

Peter laughs. “Thanks, dude.”

“But even if you do, someone will always be there to help you. I might not be able to do all that superhero shit but I’ll try my best.”

Harley moves closer, his shoulder up against Peters and he bumps it playfully.

\-----

In Ohio, Harley convinces him to visit Cedar Falls in Hocking Hills State Park. They stay at a bed and breakfast that reminds him a little too much of Tony’s cabin. They eat a hearty breakfast in the morning before going out to hike the trails. 

Peter’s never been much of an outdoor person, not really. He’s never gone camping in his life and has no desire to sleep in a tent.

“Oh come on,” Harley says as they walk down a path into the woods. “You’ve never slept outside?”

“I’ve been unconscious while outside,” Peter says with a grin and Harley rolls his eyes.

“You are such a city boy,” he coos at him. “I should have forced you to sleep outside at the cabin when I had the chance. You’re lucky we don’t have a tent right now.”

“Alright country boy,” Peter counters. “Feel free to get eaten by a bear while you’re out there.”

The hike isn’t very long, only a half a mile or so until they come upon the falls in all their glory. Peter’s never seen waterfalls like this before and he stops abruptly when it comes into full view. Harley squeezes his hand and then let's go, walking a little ahead of Peter.

The falls are breathtaking, the water cascades down the rocks into a pool below. It smells like rain and clean air, there’s no wind but Peter can still feel the mist cool against his skin. Harley’s standing closer to the falls, on a wet rock where a few other people stand. He’s already stripped his clothing off, stands in a pair of blue swim trunks, looking back at Peter with waiting eyes.

Peter strips down to his swim trunks, a pair with tiny little Iron Man heads all over them. A gift, not too long ago, from Ned. Harley waits until Peter’s close before he goes out into the water. They don’t go very far, the water only reaches their midsections. They splash around a little, there’s a family with kids that come out into the water and they move out and off to the side. They sit out on the rocks that overlook the falls and pool, stretch their legs out.

It’s a cool afternoon, not too hot and the water was chill too. The sun feels nice against his skin and Peter leans back on his hands. 

“I had to listen to Tony die,” Peter says suddenly, the rush of water feels like it’s pushing the words out of him. Words he’s kept buried inside himself for so long, now he’s a waterfall spilling them out. “I was there, kneeling in front of him, just crying and I could barely control myself. The last thing he ever said was kid. It’s what he called me and then I heard his heart stop beating. And it’s not the first time, Ben died in my arms, the last thing he said was my name and then his heart stopped. I just want to know why I’m cursed like this.”

He can hear Harley’s breath hitch, he moves closer, wraps his arms around Peter’s shoulder. He pulls him in close, fits himself up against Harley’s side. Peter shivers at the contact of cool wet skin on his.

“I’m sorry,” Harley says after a few moments. “I can’t imagine how much that sucked.”

Peter laughs a burst of bubbling laughter that spills over him. Harley starts too and they sit side by side, shivering and laughing. 

“Come on, I’m freezing, let’s get back to the hotel,” Harley says and then gets to his feet, pulling Peter up with him.

\-----

A hundred miles from Queens, Peter tries not to throw up in a gas station bathroom. He’s feeling queasy, an ache in his stomach that isn’t going away. He stumbles out of the gas station and walks to the car where Harley's waiting.

He gets in and Harley doesn’t start the car instead turns and looks at Peter. “Talk to me.”

Peter shrugs his shoulders. He’s so close to home but he’s never felt farther away. He’s still on Titan, clinging to Tony for dear life and then minutes later, watching as Tony dies. He’s five years and 5 months ago all at the same time. 

“Going home makes it real,” he admits. “The second we get back to Queens, real-life starts again and Tony’s dead.”

“Tony’s dead now too, Pete,” Harley says softly. “There’s no bringing him back.”

Peter nods, lays his head against the headrest. “You think after having most of my parental figures die, I would be over this.”

“Pete, there’s no getting over this sort of thing. Hell, my Dad left me like 10 years ago and I still think about it all the time. No one expects you to be good with things. I’m counting on your being a hot mess because I am also going to be a hot mess too.”

Peter laughs at this, turns his head, and sees Harley sitting in the driver's seat. He's' wearing one of Peter’s shirts again and a pair of shorts, Peter doubts he’ll get back half his wardrobe but it doesn’t bother him.

He starts laughing, the tears falling down his face without abandonment anymore. After a minute Harley’s laughing too and they laugh together for a while. 

\-----

They arrive in front of Peter’s apartment, Harley parks and they exit the vehicle together. Harley comes around and offers his hand out for Peter to take.

He does, Harley’s hand is warm and safe in his. 

“Ready?” Harley asks him, as they stand in front of the apartment, May, Pepper and Morgan wait for them upstairs, as does the world and life Peter has to live in, one without Tony.

Peter turns and smiles at Harley, who blushes just a little. “Yeah, I think so.”

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on [Tumblr](http://asyouleft.tumblr.com). :)


End file.
